—for Craig Santos Perez
Because it’s the rhythm, repetition,
that sweet hollowing
of our mouths around the words—
not the words themselves—
that repair the sky, we enter his absence silently,
as arable light, as a disavowed country
returned to, hesitantly,
knowing everything has changed,
as bullets
melted down and cast into bells.
No grace. No atonement. No mass
graves turned to temples turned to proof
some seas can be parted. Some seas can be parted. Some seas
sound like our teeth parting, then biting down
on whatever we’ve been told
might help. The cost of belonging,
he would say, before looking down at his hands.
From wherever we plant our hands now
grows
a small house by a bay we cannot escape,
a tin roof and rain
as it percusses a tin roof, soaks into our hair, and becomes no longer
rain;
father, here it is:
a makeshift altar of votive candles—one
after another after another almost-
fallen star, with maybe a few fallen stars; no atonement,
grace, maybe
alms, maybe your harness.