Friday
Two gods fight, and you reap the benefits. You may find a gold tooth on the sidewalk. If you don’t, search for street art. A white heart means you will live forever. If someone has painted your portrait, a time traveler has fallen in love with you. Bury your baby teeth and wait for a phone call.
 
 
Sunday
Wear orange today, so the spirits can see you. Throw away any bills originating from a zip code that ends in zero. Apply blue eye shadow. Place cosmetic jewelry beneath your pillow and go to sleep. If you’re lucky, Elizabeth Taylor will come and replace your rhinestones with diamonds.
 
 
Tuesday
If the air outside smells like popcorn, call out of work. Clean your closets. Carve a pumpkin. Watch your favorite TV show in real-time. Go outside only if the wind blows a newspaper into your yard. Pay attention to the headlines on the page. If the headlines look like hieroglyphics, you’re the next Nostradamus.